Couples always decide for themselves how many sessions they would like to have. Most couples arrange six sessions to find a way to improve their relationship so both partners are happier.
I don’t believe talking always helps. If couples always say or don’t say the same thing, and always hear or don’t hear the same thing, then it causes frustration and leads to a feeling of hopelessness. What can help? Different conversations, new information, positive surprises and new strategies. And most of all: having new experiences as a couple. We normally leave a gap of three-to-four weeks between meetings to ensure couples have sufficient time for these new experiences. I provide you with recommendations and “homework” to support you during this time.
Couples therapy with just one partner is also an option. In these cases, I work with individual clients to help improve their relationship. This can be very successful, because the quality of a relationship and the partners’ life can change when one individual in the system changes. It is also my experience that partners who are initially reluctant or sceptical have concerns of their own and soon decide to come to a counselling session.
Let us consider together how you have developed in your relationship, and what needs and messages are at the root of your crisis… And what you can do to get back to that place where you feel you do work.
A separation is associated with considerable emotional costs and is possibly one of the most difficult decisions of your entire life. As a couples therapist, I help couples to recognise the opportunities they have before they give up.
The costs of couples therapy, couples counselling or marriage counselling are generally not covered by health insurance.
“Have patience with the unresolved issues in your heart, and try to love the questions themselves, as if they were locked rooms, or books written in a very foreign language. The point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.”
Rainer Maria Rilke, “Letter to a Young Poet”